Bill Clinton Should Have an Affair with the Obama Girl

In the short amount of time that I’ve been eligible to vote (18 years), most of the choices haven’t been hard.  For the first time, I am faced with an election where I have no dog in the fight.  Going through the list in alphabetical order:

Senator Clinton: First, she does not appeal to me at all.  She strikes me as a cold, manipulative person.  Second, she floated the idea that every newborn should get a $5,000 savings bond.  She’s either planning to raise my taxes or kill all the babies.  Either way, I’m not for it.  It really bothers me that she’s eligible for her Congressional pension and her husband’s Presidential pension and his Governor’s pension for the rest of her life. I can’t get one pension, and she’s going to potentially have 4 (if she gets elected)?  Here’s an idea-waive your right to those pensions during the campaign!  That’ll make people notice you.  Better yet, have your husband get caught in a tryst with the Obama Girl and then tell America that, despite your hurt, you’re standing by your man. 

Governor Huckabee: First, the name isn’t presidential.  “Mickey Mantle” is a name that belonged in the Hall of Fame, if you know what I mean. Second, I like the Fair Tax. Finally, someone who gets it-we’re overtaxed and tired of it.  However, you can’t run a national campaign on one issue.  His record sounds like a financial liberal.  Gives a great interview.  Disciplined enough to lose weight.  All good things, but the package isn’t enough.

Senator McCain: I’ve written about him before.  Spent a lot of time arguing with his party and conservatives, in particular, and now wants to convince us that he’s one of us.  Guys like Reagan reached across the aisle.  McCain walks over and joins the other side. Sorry, Johnny.  You are an American success story and a hero, but you’ll never get my vote. 

Senator Obama: Let’s see…Wants to get friendly with Raul Castro.  Check.  Says that he will find new revenue streams (taxes) to support proposed budgets.  Check.  Says we can’t deport the 12,000,000 illegals living in the country. Check.  Wants to pull the troops out of Iraq by April 2008. Check. All the makings of a four-year horror movie.  Part of politics is like-ability, and he’s got it.  However, smoke and mirrors doesn’t solve our problems. Wrong on so many issues, he makes Roger Clemens look like a genius.

Today at breakfast with two of my oldest and dearest friends, I floated the idea of writing me in as a candidate in November.  Apparently, I’m getting 2 or 3 votes from that one meeting!  The momentum is kicking in!